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Literature Text
Finland Man is like this.
When wake up in morning, Finland Man first think about gross national product. Must work lot. Before die, have to pay house to bank. Bank take 50 percent of Finland Man salary. Government tax office take 60 percent. Must work more.
Finland Man is like this.
When get out of bed, Finland Man go to kitchen. Drink coffee. Check e-mails. Eat one moose. If enough time, say hello to Woman at home. Not show emotions. Then Finland Man go to work.
Finland Man is like this.
When drive out of garage, Finland Man look at neighbour's car. If neighbour's car smaller, Finland Man smile. If neighbour's car bigger, Finland Man not show emotions.
Finland Man is like this.
When get to work, Finland Man never stop. When Finland Man was little child, not get milk from Mother. Get protestant ethic. When Finland Man have own funeral, then downshift.
Finland Man is like this.
When 12 o'clock, Finland Man have lunch. Eat one moose. Eat alone. Not speak to anybody. If waiter smile, Finland Man think: "Why I look funny?" Not show emotions. Check e-mails.
Finland Man is like this.
When Friday, Finland Man go to drink beer with other Finland Man. Not speak. When drink too much beer and bottle of vodka, say to other Finland Man: "You my best friend." Then go to karaoke. Sing sad song. This happy moment.
Finland Man is like this.
When young, go to one party. Late evening go to speak Woman. If lucky, Woman speak too. Then build home. Eat moose together.
Finland Man is like this.
When Saturday, Finland Man go to sauna. Throw seven buckets of water on rocks. After sauna have appointment in bedroom with Woman. Not show emotions.
Finland Man is like this.
When Woman at home ask about love, Finland Man not answer. Finland Man say: "This we already talk on the altar." Not show emotions.
Finland Man is like this.
When Woman at home want divorce and leave Finland Man, Finland Man surprised. Not show emotions. Finland Man go to forest and talk to tree. Then eat moose alone. Check e-mails.
Finland Man is like this.
When holiday, Finland Man drive car to lake. Finland Man is better driver than everybody. Finland Man drive country road fast. If comes moose, too bad. Moose die. Finland Man eat.
Finland Man is like this.
When with other people, Finland Man want to be alone. When alone, Finland Man ask himself: "Why nobody like me?" Eat one moose. Check e-mails.
Finland Man is like this.
When almost retired, Finland Man have heart attack. Not tell anybody, because is shame. Check e-mails. Then die. This was Finland Man.
When wake up in morning, Finland Man first think about gross national product. Must work lot. Before die, have to pay house to bank. Bank take 50 percent of Finland Man salary. Government tax office take 60 percent. Must work more.
Finland Man is like this.
When get out of bed, Finland Man go to kitchen. Drink coffee. Check e-mails. Eat one moose. If enough time, say hello to Woman at home. Not show emotions. Then Finland Man go to work.
Finland Man is like this.
When drive out of garage, Finland Man look at neighbour's car. If neighbour's car smaller, Finland Man smile. If neighbour's car bigger, Finland Man not show emotions.
Finland Man is like this.
When get to work, Finland Man never stop. When Finland Man was little child, not get milk from Mother. Get protestant ethic. When Finland Man have own funeral, then downshift.
Finland Man is like this.
When 12 o'clock, Finland Man have lunch. Eat one moose. Eat alone. Not speak to anybody. If waiter smile, Finland Man think: "Why I look funny?" Not show emotions. Check e-mails.
Finland Man is like this.
When Friday, Finland Man go to drink beer with other Finland Man. Not speak. When drink too much beer and bottle of vodka, say to other Finland Man: "You my best friend." Then go to karaoke. Sing sad song. This happy moment.
Finland Man is like this.
When young, go to one party. Late evening go to speak Woman. If lucky, Woman speak too. Then build home. Eat moose together.
Finland Man is like this.
When Saturday, Finland Man go to sauna. Throw seven buckets of water on rocks. After sauna have appointment in bedroom with Woman. Not show emotions.
Finland Man is like this.
When Woman at home ask about love, Finland Man not answer. Finland Man say: "This we already talk on the altar." Not show emotions.
Finland Man is like this.
When Woman at home want divorce and leave Finland Man, Finland Man surprised. Not show emotions. Finland Man go to forest and talk to tree. Then eat moose alone. Check e-mails.
Finland Man is like this.
When holiday, Finland Man drive car to lake. Finland Man is better driver than everybody. Finland Man drive country road fast. If comes moose, too bad. Moose die. Finland Man eat.
Finland Man is like this.
When with other people, Finland Man want to be alone. When alone, Finland Man ask himself: "Why nobody like me?" Eat one moose. Check e-mails.
Finland Man is like this.
When almost retired, Finland Man have heart attack. Not tell anybody, because is shame. Check e-mails. Then die. This was Finland Man.
This is an english translation for a humoristic blog post by Heikki Aittokoski, a foreign journalist, which was published in Helsingin Sanomat, a newspaper. I found it so hilarious that I wanted to share it with those who don't speak finnish.
This is a word-for-word translation to maintain the humor, ergo the grammatical errors were intentional by the original writer.
Original post: www.hs.fi/blogi/narrienlaiva/a…
The text in it is finglish, a mix of finnish and english. Aka english written on the basis of how a Finn hears it.
This is a word-for-word translation to maintain the humor, ergo the grammatical errors were intentional by the original writer.
Original post: www.hs.fi/blogi/narrienlaiva/a…
The text in it is finglish, a mix of finnish and english. Aka english written on the basis of how a Finn hears it.
© 2015 - 2024 Monarth
Comments1
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Great job is done by this smart dude, but I think there are some more nations you could describe this way ...